Golden Boy Nithyananda = King Midas 2.0, and Yes, All that Glitter is Gold, But Maybe Not So Golden
Paramahamsa Nithyananda, are you materialistic? Why how silly of me to ask. I know you will say, "No". OK, then, Sri Nithyananda, I just have a few questions to help clear things up. Why did you charge $150 for the Kalpataru program in May 2009 and just a few months later you raised the price to $250 for this one-day program? Same thing, Sri Nithyananda, with your Nithyananda Spurana Program (NSP). Why in 2004 in a hotel, you charged $250 for the two-day program. But, in 2009, you now charge $750 per person for the same program without occurring the expense of a hall rental. Why that’s a 300 percent increase. Did you, Sri Nithyananda, get just that much better? Why even Google’s stock didn’t go up that much over the past five years.
And, why do you use so much gold? Nithyananda, I see that you have gold plated your super big mala (rosary). Is it now a bling-bling? Yo! Wassup, Swamiji? And, in July 2009, did you, Nithyananda, solicited in e-mail tax deductible donations for 24K gold flowers to be placed at your feet in exchange for the donors having their names presented to you for ‘blessings’? Is that what it takes to get your blessings? What if someone couldn't afford to donate a 24K gold flower, Sri Nithyananda? Would you still bless them?
And, after declaring that you gave 'enlightenment' to 53 of your close followers, did you, Sri Nithyananda, then pat your self on the back by splurging on a gold throne that is coated in 24K gold? Did you say that you are now 'qualified' to sit on this golden throne? Sri Nithyananda, did anyone else ever sit on this throne? Oh, yes, there was that incident in 2007 where some homeless junkie wandered into your Vedic Temple in Montclair while he was as 'high as kite' and while in a stuper sat right there on your 24K golden throne. Did this druggie take a bath afterwards? Boy, Sri Nithyananda, that throne is sure heavy to carry. Good thing there’s a healing master at hand, or all of those volunteers probably would be sporting sprang backs or hernias. Did you, Sri Nithyananda, really plan to have something so high maintenance?
Another question, Sri Nithyananda. Do you have a 24K gold crown? Why yes, we have even seen you wear this 24K gold crown. Sorry to say, Sri Nithyananda, but when you wear it, you kind of look like Jughead from the Archie’s comics.
Paramahamsa Nithyananda, can you name any enlightened master that has this sort of love for gold? For the life of me, I cannot imagine Paramahamsa Ramakrishna, Shirdi Baba, Swami Vivekananda, Ramana Maharishi, anyone, who would be so bold as you, Sri Nithyananda. Please help. There have been a lot of worldly kings, nouveau riche, and drug dealers that have done this sort of conspicuous consumption. Nithyanadna, are you the newly rich king of sanyasis who just cornered the spiritual market? You know, the hybrid of a renunciate, a powerful politician, and a gangster? Oh, sorry, Sri Nithyananda, I forgot there is a spiritual side to wearing all that gold. Osho loved to wear diamonds, and you like to wear gold. I see the connection now.
And, will there be anything to help the poor, the meek, and the humble out of all of these donations, Sri Nithyananda? And, you will say “Yes, just look at my website.” Oh, I see, Sri Nithyananda. There is an image and a link that we can ‘donate’ additional money on top of all the other money donated to you in order to help those recent flood victims. But, you seem very reluctant to say how much you, personally, donated. Isn’t that kind of like if Warren Buffett giving a commitment to give something back to humanity just by promising to ‘trick or treating’ for UNICEF next year? Nithyananda, we were kind of hoping you would do a little more than provide just a link.
And, Paramahamsa Nithyananda, do you think you can make your donations and allocations a little more transparent? Didn’t you, Sri Nithyananda, once promise the Ananda Samajis (donors) who were tithing (giving ten percent) that their money would help the local Nithyananda Centers? And, what happened to that money, Nithyananda? Didn’t you divert it to your main ashram in India to help achieve your new grand priorities there, leaving your local centers high and dry? Isn’t that kind of like a shell game where we get to guess which shell still has the pea under it? Wow, Nithyananda, I see your empire is going to be big one day, just like Enron. For your next wave of ananda sevaks (fulltime volunteers) do you, Sri Nithyananda, need some more accountants and lawyers? Don’t forget the telemarketers.
And, what about all the income from your programs, Sri Nithyananda? With workshops at your Indian ashram going for $6,000 to $8,000 USD a pop, why then do you find it necessary to ask all of these new 'enlightened' graduates to tithe (give 10 percent of their gross income) to you? Just think about it, if people had modest incomes of $50,000 a year... all it would take is to get 200 of them to tithe, and you have become a millionaire each and every year. But, we know you target the super wealthy... so is your goal is to get a whole stadium full of money? Oh, what a coincidence. Nithyananda, I see you have plans to build a new stadium so you can fill it with more potential donors. Sri Nithyananda, will there will be a VIP section in your stadium, bright lights, a big throne (24K golden of course), a scoreboard, plenty of cheerleaders, and a special 'backstage' room? I knew you wouldn't disappoint us.